What to Expect at Your First IEP Meeting: A Complete Parent Guide

Show Notes:
Have you ever walked into a room and felt totally outnumbered, like everyone else was speaking a foreign language? That’s exactly how most parents feel at their first IEP meeting – but it doesn’t have to be that way.

Your first IEP meeting doesn’t have to feel overwhelming. In this step-by-step video guide, you’ll discover exactly what to expect at your first IEP meeting as a parent, including who sits at the table, how to prepare your parent input statement, what happens during the meeting, and your options afterward.

Whether your child is just entering special education or you’re navigating this process for the first time, this 15-minute parent guide gives you the confidence and knowledge to advocate effectively.

📋 FREE RESOURCE: Grab my IEP Meeting Checklist with the 15 most important questions to ask at your meeting

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

✅ Understand each team member’s role (LEA, evaluation interpreter, special ed teacher, etc.)

✅ Learn how to write a powerful parent input statement

✅ Know when and how to speak up during the meeting

✅ Discover your options if you disagree with the outcome

✅ Build ongoing collaboration with your child’s team

Remember: You are your child’s best advocate. This meeting is just the first step on a journey, and you’re not locked into anything forever. Stay involved, stay communicating, and trust your instincts.

Work with Tonya as an IEP Coach: If you’re looking for personalized support, a trusted partner, and expert guidance through the IEP process, I would be honored to be part of your team. Find more information about my IEP coaching services here: https://waterprairie.com/iepcoach

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Music Used:

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Artist: http://audionautix.com/

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Episode #140: What to Expect at Your First IEP Meeting as a Parent

Have you ever walked into a room and felt totally outnumbered, like everyone else was speaking a foreign language? That’s exactly how most parents feel at their first IEP meeting – but it doesn’t have to be that way.

(Recorded October 11 2025)

Full Transcript of Episode 140:

Introduction: Why First IEP Meetings Feel Overwhelming

Tonya: Have you ever walked into a room and felt totally outnumbered? Maybe it seemed like everyone else was speaking a foreign language.

That feeling of uncertainty and even dread is so common for parents walking into their first IEP meeting. If that’s you, you’re in the right place.

When my daughter, Emily, was first entering the public school system, she was coming out of the early intervention program, so we had it a little bit easy because I knew some of the people that were sitting at the table at that first IEP meeting.

I didn’t understand what was being said. I took everything at face value, and I just sat and listened. I had no idea what to ask, what to say, what it all meant. I was just going with the flow.

However, we moved to different states twice after she started in the process, and before she was into second grade we were already in the third state that she was in. So I remember, even though I had been through the process before, going into a new state and a new school district was just as intimidating as that very first meeting when she was two years old, not even three years old yet.

And then when my son came along and needed to get into the system, I had a lot of experience. But it still took me time before I really felt comfortable with understanding what to expect and what my role was as a parent at the IEP table.

In fact, for my son, we were told no twice before he was approved for special education, and that was after we went into private testing to bring that information back to the school before they agreed with us, that yes, he did need support. So I understand how intimidating it can be no matter what you’re coming in from or what your experience may be.

So this video is for you. If you are going into that first IEP meeting or you’re still not comfortable going in, I wanna try to help alleviate some of those concerns for you and help you know what to expect.

Welcome to the Water Prairie Chronicles, a podcast for parents of children with disabilities. I’m your host, Tonya Wollum, and I’m glad you’re here today.

So let’s take the mystery and the anxiety out of the IEP meeting. This episode is your roadmap, so

 you can walk in feeling prepared, knowledgeable and confident, not panicked.

Go ahead and grab something to take notes with.

You’ll want to jot down the team members and what you should take with you to the meeting.

Who’s on the IEP /team (and What Each Person Does)

So let’s start by talking about who’s at the table, who’s on the team? The IEP team itself. The number of people in the room can be a little bit intimidating, so let’s break down who they are. The IEP team is a key group of people who are all going to play a role in putting that program together for your child. So here’s some of the people that will be at the meeting. First of all, you are there, you’re the parent. You know your child the best, and it is crucial that you are at this meeting.

The special education teacher is another person that will be there.

This person will be your main point of contact with the plan and any accommodations. Then you’re gonna have a general education teacher. This person will make sure that the plan works in the general classroom.

Then you’re gonna have an LEA representative. LEA stands for Local Education Agency. This is someone that will be an administrator who can commit the resources that are needed to put the program together. Then you’ll have an evaluation interpreter, and this person is, there’s different roles that they could be coming from, but this is someone who is equipped with being able to explain the testing data and what it means for your child.

So this is a key person for you to be able to ask questions of during the meeting.

Now you might see other people there too, so you may have a school psychologist there. There might be a speech and language pathologist, an occupational therapist. there may be a support person that you invite to take with you.

It could be a friend or an IEP coach, and the school may have other people in there as well.

So here’s a question for you. Have you ever felt lost in a meeting where there are a lot of professionals around you? And comment below, what’s your biggest worry about your first IEP meeting?

How to Prepare: Paperwork, Parent Input & What to Bring

Now let’s talk about the paperwork and the preparation. So preparation’s gonna be your superpower here. You want to do a few things before the first meeting.

So first of all, you wanna get a review draft of the IEP. If you get a draft, don’t ignore it. You wanna read this, highlight any confusing parts.

Circle the concerns that you have, highlight or circle the words that you don’t understand. Or if there are acronyms in there, they’re going to be a lot. And if you don’t know what they are, then circle and highlight those. This is your preview. Don’t wait until the meeting. This is gonna give you a chance to know what do I understand already and what are my questions or concerns.

The second thing is you want to write what’s called a parent input statement. As an IEP coach, this is something that I help my clients with all the time, so it’s an easy thing to put together, but it can be a little bit overwhelming if you don’t have an idea of what to put in.

So you want to put this together because this is your voice put into writing, and you want to include the strengths for your child. What does your child do well? You want to have concerns and needs. These are your concerns and needs. So what challenges do you see at home and at school? And you wanna have your vision in there.

What do you hope that your child’s gonna be able to do in a year, in five years after graduation? Put all of this in writing.

And the third thing is, what do you wanna bring with you? You wanna bring a binder with any documents that you have. I would recommend that you have a three ring binder that you’ve already started. If not yet, go and get one today and get this going. Put copies of any medical paperwork that you have that shows what the child’s need is, what the diagnosis is.

 If you’ve worked with therapist, you can keep your sheets in there. How they give you your updates. If you’re coming out of early intervention, you may have some of the reports that they’ve given you of what was happening and what the therapy was.

You can file these in there so you always have access to them. And then you want to also bring a list of questions. When you went through the IEP and you highlighted it. Jot down what those questions are, and you’ll need a pen and a notepad or some blank paper of some sort so that you have a place to write your concerns or you can write what you’re learning as you go.

And then that draft, IEP that they gave you with the notes, make sure that that’s in the binder as well. Take all of that with you.

Now, another thing you can do to prepare is mental preparation. You wanna take a few deep breaths before you walk into that room. Remember, you are going to be there because you love your child. And this is a collaboration. It’s not a confrontation. So you’re going in to be part of this team, and as we said, you are that crucial member coming in who knows your child and you’re gonna see the bigger picture. The school sees your child just during the school day.

You see your child before school, during school, after school, at bedtime at night, and on the weekends. So you’re bringing in information that no one else knows.

What Happens During the Meeting (Step-by-Step)

Now let’s move on to the meeting itself. You’ve prepared, you took those deep breaths, you’ve walked into the door. What happens during the meeting itself? So knowing the flow can help you stay a little bit calm and to know when to ask questions. So first, you’re gonna have introductions and ground rules.

 Everyone’s going to introduce themselves. They may pass around a paper where you’re signing your role and your name, for an attendance. You may not remember everyone specifically, but at least you’ll have an idea of who’s there. And feel free to jot down names as you’re going.

Then they’re going to review the evaluation and present levels, and you’ll see the letters, PLAAFP.So the PLAAFP stands for present levels of academic achievement and Functional Performance.

It’s a lot of words, but it’s just the present levels. Where are they right now? And, this is gonna be the heart of the IEP. It shows where your child is now based on the testing and the teacher feedback that they have.

So this is where you’re coming into the meeting from. You wanna check this for accuracy.

If this section seems off, the rest of the plan’s going to be off too. So be listening, look at this. You should have it in writing, and it should have been in that draft that you had already, but this will be the next section they go to.

Then they’re gonna move into the discussion of goals. The team is gonna propose goals for your child, and these are what your child will be working toward in the next year.

You wanna make sure these are smart goals. If you don’t remember from back in school. Smart goals include that they are specific, they’re measurable, they’re attainable, they’re relevant, and they’re time bound.

As you’re talking about the goals you want to ask, how will you measure that, and how often will I get updates? And these are typical questions and things that you need to know so that you know how to understand what’s happening with the goals for your child and how they’re making progress.

Typically, you’re gonna be updated whenever report cards go out, but each school is different in how they do this.

The next part is gonna be the services and placement. So you have the goals that you’ve set up, but how are you going to get to those goals? So the service that’s being provided and where your child’s going to be for those services is what the next part is.

This will cover how much time your child’s going to spend in special education versus general education. So being in a separate setting outside of the regular classroom or in the regular classroom, and when their services we’re talking about, may be speech, Occupational therapy, it could be orientation & mobility if your child is visually impaired, or a teacher for the visually impaired. There are different professionals who will be coming in and out to work with your child, depending on what your child’s needs and goals are, and these services need to match the goal. Then the next section that I wanna talk about is speaking up and taking notes.

It’s okay to pause things. As you’re going through, you’re going to get a lot of information at this first meeting because this is where they’re bringing all the data, all the testing in, and this is all new for you. So feel free to to take a pause and say. If they say FBA, it’s like, what does that mean?

If you hear LRE, BIP, there are a lot of different acronyms that you’re gonna hear and you may not be familiar with these. So stop and just say, you know, I’m not sure what this is. Can you tell me? They’re not going to mind you doing that, so, make sure that you understand and feel free to ask for a definition.

You wanna take notes. You need to ask for a five minute break if you’re getting overwhelmed or you’re just, it’s too much to take in, ask, you know, can, can we take a, a short break? It’s gonna be okay. So, feel free to just, you know, pause if you need to and then come back to it.

And then the last part is the signature.

And in most states, your signature just means that you attended the meeting. And it’s not saying that you agree with anything. Feel free to ask what the signature means if you’re not sure, since this is your first meeting. But typically signature means attendance only, and if you’re unsure, you can ask for more time and indicate that you only wanna consent to certain sections, that type of thing.

But you do want to sign it showing attendance because you want to prove that you were there. You want it to be on record that you were at the meeting.

After the Meeting: Follow-Up and Ongoing Advocacy

The meeting is over, what do you do now? So even though the meeting’s over your advocacy is just beginning really, because now you have the guide of what you know the school has agreed to, you want to be part of where we’re going moving forward now.

So first I would follow up. You should receive a final copy of the IEP within a few days or weeks.

Sometimes you may get a draft copy of it right out of the meeting. But the final one they should have for you later. ’cause they have to go through the authorization process. And I typically would get mine for my kids within the first two days. Afterwards, it would be an envelope that would either come home with one of the kids or if I was at the school, they would hand it to me.

Double check that all the changes and agreements that you covered in the meeting are included on the final copy. And the members of the team want this to be right. So it’s not a problem for you to point out if something was miswritten or represented wrong. Don’t hesitate to reach out if you spot a mistake.

If you disagree. If you leave the meeting and you feel uneasy about this or you’re unhappy with the outcome, you do have some options. One of the things that you can do is you can request another meeting if you need more information or if you want to talk about this more with the team because

 you’re just not comfortable with how it turned out, you could ask for another meeting. You could write a detailed letter about your concerns and send that to the team. And then you could also use the state’s dispute resolution process, which often starts with mediation. I highly recommend that you work through other options first.

And the first one would be to talk to your special education teacher because they’re gonna be your point of contact, and they probably will have some good advice for you of what to do, or maybe to understand better why a certain decision was made. But ask your questions, work with them, write your letters, work with the school, and leave mediation as your last resort.

Now you want to keep records. We talked about that binder. I want to make sure that you understand that you want to keep this as an ongoing record of what’s happening. So you’re wanting to keep all of the documents, the notes, the emails in your binder. Every time you write the school, print out a copy of that email and the response so you have a paper trail of what’s happening.

You wanna stay connected, check in with the teachers and the service providers regularly. Send them notes of encouragement. If your child comes home and talks about something they really enjoyed, send that to them.

Keep that relationship as a positive one so that you’re working together and find ways that you can support them.

It’s going to help your child if they’re working on one task with their therapist once a week, and you know what it is, and can support that at home by working with them too.

So you’re working at this collaboratively. It’s not just a meeting. It’s the whole plan that’s surrounding your child. You want to be part of this plan, and you wanna ask for updates on your child’s progress.

Don’t wait until the next annual meeting to address concerns. Stay involved, stay communicating with it.

Your Next Steps

Now, this first meeting can seem overwhelming, but remember that you’re not the only one who’s been through this. You’re going to revisit and revise it as your child’s growing. You’re not locked into anything forever.

This first meeting is, that’s all it is. It’s the first meeting. You’re moving forward from here, and you’re going to come outta this meeting, and in six months you might feel that there needs to be a tweak or a change. Stay in touch with with your child’s team, with your child’s school. This is just the first step on a journey that’s going to last a lifetime, and you’re taking it to make sure that your child gets what they need to thrive.

You are your child’s best advocate. I can’t say that enough times. You get to know them better than anyone else that will ever sit around the IEP table.

FREE IEP Meeting Checklist

Before you go, I know walking into your first IEP meeting can feel overwhelming. Trust me, I’ve been there. That’s why I created a free IEP meeting checklist with the 15 most important questions you should ask. This is the same checklist I wish I’d had during our early meetings. You can grab it completely free at waterprairie.com/iepmeetingchecklist.

Just enter your name and email, and I’ll send it right to your inbox. Print it out, bring it to your meeting, and feel confident knowing you’re asking the right questions.

The link is in the description below, and if this video helped you feel more prepared, please give it a thumbs up and subscribe for more special education tips.

You’ve got this, and I’m here to help you along the way. I’ll see you next time.

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Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ):

Q1. What does PLAAFP stand for and why is it important?
A1. PLAAFP stands for Present Levels of Academic Achievement and Functional Performance. It is the most critical section of the IEP because it outlines exactly where your child is currently performing and provides the legal basis for all services and goals that are recommended.

Q2. What is the difference between signing the IEP for attendance versus agreement?
A2. In most states, your signature on the IEP is confirmation that you attended the meeting. It does not necessarily mean you agree with the entire document. If you disagree, you can state your partial disagreement or utilize dispute resolution processes.

Q3. What should I bring to my child’s first IEP meeting?
A3. Bring an organized binder containing medical paperwork, any previous reports, a list of pre-written questions, and a Parent Input Statement outlining your child’s strengths, concerns, and future vision.

Q4. What should I do if the school uses an acronym I don’t understand?
A4. You have the absolute right to interrupt politely and ask for a definition. Phrases like ‘Excuse me, could you please clarify what LRE stands for?’ are necessary to ensure you are an equal partner in the discussion.